Marvel July Previews — Snark Central!

Marvel’s using a new tagline: Your Universe. Because my world is full of interchangeable blonde women in skin-tight costumes making porn faces and vein-popping steriod-muscled freaks grimacing at each other.

Ultimate Spider-Man celebrates reaching issue 100 with “three–count ‘em three–mind-staggering shock endings.” So they’re homaging the Clue movie? Or, since they work in serialized superhero comics, do they just not know what “ending” means?

Black Panther #20 cover

The Black Panther #20 cover by Esad Ribic has, for some reason, the king crouching before a demonic-looking Medusa wearing her new pastel pole-dancing costume (a bikini with bead strings, basically). It looks to me like someone said “worship the white woman!”

Blade is, they take pains to remind us, a “popular character who has launched three movies and a TV series”, yet he can’t make a comic fly. Not stopping them from trying again, though, with art by Howard Chaykin.

Hey, Speedball has “hundreds of deaths on his conscious” (Civil War: Front Line). How many did he kill unconsciously? (They mean “conscience”.)

Matt Fraction (Casanova) is writing the new ongoing Punisher War Journal which launches as a Civil War tie-in. I thought it was kind of strange that they were also doing a black-and-white variant edition until I realized that the character and the art, by Ariel Olivetti, both looked much better that way.

It’s fabulous that Marvel is paying homage to “the 65th Anniversary of Stan Lee’s employment at Marvel” (although emphasizing his creations over his job status would be a little more complimentary), but it would be nice if they could manage to get the right blurbs on the right issues. The descriptions of Stan Lee Meets Spider-Man and Stan Lee Meets Dr. Strange are clearly flipped. (Not to mention that if someone was going to mispell a word in the phrase “Greenwich Village”, I’d expect it to be the first one.) Alan Davis’ Dr. Strange looks amazing, capturing his majesty.

2 Responses to “Marvel July Previews — Snark Central!”

  1. Alan Coil Says:

    Last paragraph—mispell v. misspell.

  2. Johanna Says:

    Ha ha ha! That’s what always happens when someone makes spelling corrections, isn’t it? I’m leaving it up as an object lesson… but at least mine wasn’t in print to thousands of people I’m trying to get to buy my products.




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