Fanfiction Sample: The Hulk

This is one of KC’s ideas, and I love it.

Why does the Hulk always fight guys like Thor or the Thing? Why doesn’t Hulk fight, say, Kitty Pryde? Imagine…

The Hulk tries to swing at Kitty. Kitty laughes, sinks into the ground, comes up behind him, and starts tickling. “Hulk ticklish!” he cries, collapsing, and she wins.

(This also provides lots of fodder for arguments as fanboys debate whether Hulk would really be ticklish. All I can say is, remember the Defenders era.)

For a followup, imagine the DC crossover as Hulk drowns his sorrows in a bar with a new friend. “Me understood,” sobs Bizarro.

11 Responses to “Fanfiction Sample: The Hulk”

  1. John Says:

    Too funny! Let’s hope somebody over at Marvel sees this… :0)

    Has Hulk ever fought Superman? A battle of wits with Bizarro would be excellent, or better yet, a ‘buddy’ story, where dumb Hulk and Bizarro have to solve a mystery to save their lives :0)

  2. Allan Says:

    Yeah, there was a Superman/Hulk crossover a few years ago — it was drawn by Steve Rude.

    Then there was the Archie vs the Punisher book.

    And, once, Aunt May fought Galactus — and won!!

  3. Paul O'Brien Says:

    Surely it’s not THAT unusual for the Hulk to fight non-brawling villains. After all, his archenemy is the Leader, who’s just a guy with a big head. If anything, it’s one of the more obvious ways of presenting the character with a challenge while holding to the idea that he’s the strongest guy in the world, just as it is with Superman.

  4. Alan David Doane Says:

    I think the Kitty vs. Juggernaut scene in X-Men 3 gives you a pretty good idea how that one would go…

  5. Jer Says:

    I really want to read a Bizarro/Hulk crossover where Bizarro and Hulk have to team up to solve a mystery now. Especially if there are cute kittens involved.

    And a comic book where Hulk is defeated by someone tickling him until he either passes out from laughing so hard or he just gets so amused that he turns back into Banner would be hysterical. Someone should really do something like that in the new Marvel Adventures Avengers book. (The regular Marvel Universe is too stoic for that thing right now, so it would have to be in the unleaded version).

  6. Johanna Says:

    If Jeff Parker is reading this, he has my permission to use the idea. :)

  7. Chris Galdieri Says:

    Hasbro should make a “Tickle Me Hulk” stuffed toy.

  8. David Oakes Says:

    Hulk has faught the Vision in numerous “Avengers deputized to bring in the menace” fights. This is usually in Hulk’s book, so he is the hero, and wins by clapping so hard it blows away the Vision even insubstantial. (And now that I think about it, I seem to recall a similar scene with Kitty.) But KC’s certainly sounds more fun.

    And I second, third, and fourth a call for a Hulk/Bizzaro buddy flick. Heck, just 22 pages of them trying to open a can of beans.

  9. Barry Says:

    Both ideas are hilarious. I would actually buy those comic books. Unless Mark Millar, Geoff Johns, Brian Bendis, JMS or Quesada worked on the books.

  10. Bill Doughty Says:

    My reading of Defenders is limited to just that first Essential volume, but yeah, that version of the Hulk would totally be ticklish.

    And the Defenders’ headquarters was eventually Nighthawk’s coverted horse stable, right? Were there ever any scenes like “Ewww… what Hulk step in?”

  11. M The Mordant Says:




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