- Posted by Johanna on April 5, 2007 at 9:25 pm
- Category: Meta
Warning, emotional blather ahead. Consider this my livejournal imitation.
I thought the cloud was lifting from my mood, but it’s back worse than ever. In the past two days, I’ve been given additional responsibilities at work (because they value my unique skills and talents, they say) and then told that I’m wasting time and not contributing enough. Anyone for mixed messages?
My boss is an old-school manager from a previous generation. I’ve been managing people myself for ten years (until recently — my team got axed in the last round of layoffs, out of which my boss got a promotion), and I get frustrated when I have to watch her do the opposite of what standard modern management training suggests. (Why use a stick on people when it’s only going to make them resent you? Why not concentrate on fixing the problem to everyone’s satisfaction instead?) I know other people have different styles, but she’s always got someone to pick on — the last five people she chose quit, quit, were moved to another department without their input, were laid off, and were laid off (while recovering from cancer) — and now it seems to be my turn.
It’s complicated by what I think is a midlife crisis. I’m coming to terms with realizing that I’m never going to get to do what I really want to do for a living (blogging and reviewing comics), so I’d better figure out what I can settle for. When I’m not feeling sorry for myself, I like the webmaster/project manager work I’ve been doing for the past twelve years, and I’m good at it, if I have the right support.
Maybe I just need a change of scenery. Anyone have any job leads in the Raleigh/Durham or Madison (Wisconsin) areas?
Thank you, loyal readers, for your ongoing patience, since content will continue to be light. I don’t really feel like reading comics right now, even the good ones.