Killing Hasselhoff
An amusing concept turns into an unfunny slog. At least Killing Hasselhoff is only 80 minutes long.
Chris (Ken Jeong) owns a nightclub. David Hasselhoff is supposed to have a party there, but he cancels, which means Chris can’t satisfy his debt to a tough guy (Will Sasso, who never seems that menacing). Since Chris has already picked Hasselhoff in a “celebrity death pool” with a huge payoff, he decides that the best thing to do would be to murder him to get the money he needs.
Aside from the fact I don’t think Jeong is very good as a lead, since he’s funnier in small doses, he seems too old for this role. This would have been better with someone who could play younger and stupider more effectively. Hasselhoff does pretty good as a self-centered celeb trying to stay relevant — his big idea of what to do next is a “superhero musical”, and he still looks ok with his shirt off, which happens a lot — but none of this kept my attention or made me laugh.
Which is a shame, given some of the cast is halfway decent. Hasselhoff’s agent is Jon Lovitz. Rhys Darby is one of Chris’ buddies who gives him some unusual murder methods. Ron Funches is another friend, a stoner who wanders off early on. Colton Dunn (Garrett on Superstore) is a hitman. Gena Lee Nolin, Michael Winslow, and Rick Fox play themselves. But it’s all very patchy, as though once the idea was acquired, no one was quite sure how far to take it or what to do with it. This trailer has all the high points of the film (aside from a random pair of nude breasts, which aren’t pictured but will likely impress the target audience):
If you try watching Killing Hasselhoff, out now on digital and DVD, you probably want to at least stick around for the credits, where Jeong and Hasselhoff sing a duet about how they’re “f***ing crushing it”. (There’s lots of Hoff cussing in this movie.) The DVD has eight-and-a-half minutes of deleted scenes, many of which feature Howie Mandel playing himself and additional cameos from Hulk Hogan. (The studio provided a review copy.)